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Looking back on my life I see how often I have tried to change my emotions. I’ve either wanted emotions to come to me or for them to go away. And one thing I’ve realized in my life is that my emotions come and go on their own. Happiness has turned into depression and sadness into joy all on its own.
With love amongst those who hate.
With acceptance amongst those who reject.
With kindness against those who are angry.
With patience amongst those who are restless.
With presence amongst those who are mindless.
With happiness amongst those who are unhappy.
With courage amongst those who are hiding.
With peace amongst those who are restless.
With freedom amongst those who are trapped.
With meditation amongst those who follow themselves.
Without ego amongst those who believe in an “I”.
With commitment amongst those who quit.
With empathy amongst everything that turns its back on you.
With open arms amongst everything that hurt you.
How do you live?
What would you add to the list?
What would you take away?
What would you change?
I find myself falling into the same traps again and again and I wonder if I’ll ever be able to escape. Will I ever find a way out? I feel like I’m repeating the same day over and over again. I make a decision to do something and I end up doing something else. I say I’m going to stop doing something and I end up doing it. This happens a lot.
And then I remember that each day comes on its own and that whatever happens, happens. I do my best and some days changes are made and on other days I end up going backwards but I always keep pushing forward. I don’t turn back.
I don’t believe I am in control and so I am patient with how things come. Whether it takes a day or ten years I do not believe I have a choice. But that doesn’t mean I don’t try. I always push forward. But the results are out of my hands. This is what I believe.
And when I look back I can see all the ways that I have changed slowly, step by step.
So even when I woke up this morning and felt like I was starting back at square one, I kept going because I have faith that one day I’ll make it a little farther along the path and one day I will have freedom.
What about you? Do you feel trapped? What are you doing to change?
Much Love,
Andy
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Short reviews on high quality films. No spoilers.
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