Meditation At A Price

I’ve been really trying to dig deep and find what it is that I want to do in life.  I love meditation and feel it can benefit anyone.  I thought about teaching meditation and helping people one one one but I don’t want to charge people for it.  I feel meditation is a basic human right and everyone should have access to it for free, including any instruction or advice that may be necessary.  That’s why I hate when people offer meditation teaching sessions and charge ridiculous prices.  Asking for donations is one thing, but asking for hundreds or thousands is a terrible thing to do.

What do you think?

If anyone ever has questions about meditation or would like to learn how I do it then please contact me.  It’s free.  And if you’re interested I will help to cut through a lot of the noise surrounding meditation.

Much Love,

Andy

Dealing With Anger When It Takes You Over

I used to have trouble with being angry all the time.  I used to get angry quickly but hold it in and not express it until the anger built up and I exploded.  One day I realized I didn’t want to be angry anymore and decided to change.  Meditation is what helped me.

Using mindfulness I started to sit with my anger instead of feeding the negative feelings associated with it.  For example, if somebody said something hurtful I used to think about why they said that instead of defending myself.  Over time I came to realize that them saying something negative about me is no reason to get angry.  Their opinions and thoughts and feelings are valid and they can think and feel whatever they like.

Of course it wasn’t that alone.  Combined with the fact that I was letting go of my “self” and seeing that the voice that uses the word “I” is just a voice and not “me” as well as being open and accepting of everything, I began to let go of my anger.

If I had to distill my process down to steps it would be:

1) When I become angry I become aware of the feeling as soon as possible.

2) Don’t react to the anger or let it push me to action right away.  Just be aware of any feelings in my body and the thoughts that are arising.

Optional:

3) Question the thoughts that are making me angry.  For example, if I’m mad at someone because they ditched me when we made plans did that person actually do something wrong?  Do I need them to apologize or make up for it?  For me the answer is no, absolutely not.  People may do as they please.  I may not make plans with them again, but I choose not to be angry because they don’t have to change to please me.  They can be however they like.

These steps need to be repeated over and over again until one day you may find that the things that used to drive you crazy become amusing.

I hope this post is clear.  It’s not really one thing in particular but a combination of love, acceptance, and awareness that I’ve been working on for years very slowly.  I’m not saying I don’t want to feel angry, I just don’t want anger to overtake me and cloud my judgement or cause me to hurt somebody.  Anger can be useful if I know how to use it.

The first step is realizing that you don’t have to be angry.  Anger doesn’t have to be the solution to a problem.  You don’t need anger to protect you all the time.  You’d be surprised how much stronger kindness is.

What do you think?  I’d love to hear your thoughts.  Once again thank you very much for taking the time to read my posts.  I don’t know if these are useful or boring but I’m sharing my path and experiences because maybe it will help someone.

Much Love,

Andy

Getting Out of Your Own Way

What does it even mean to get out of my own way?

To stop letting my “self” distract me from what I’m trying to do.  These distractions are thoughts or actions that don’t help and can hinder what I’m trying to do.

How do I get out of my own way?

By ONLY focusing on what your doing.

This can apply to anything in my life and ties in with the realization that everything is already perfect.

I already am a success I just have to realize it.

I already have everything I want I just have to realize it.

I already am happy I just have to realize it.

And I realize these things by getting out of my own way and being happy with my efforts, being content with what I have and being in the moment.

It might be hard to understand but that’s just because you’re getting in your own way.  Don’t try to intellectualize it.  Just feel it.  Be it.

I believe we’re already enlightened, we just have to get out of our own way.  Which is another way of saying, “get rid of the ego”.  See yourself for who you are, accept what you see, and live as you choose.

If you have any questions about it let me know.

Much Love,

Andy

Stuck on Repeat

I’ve found in my life I tend to make the same mistakes over and over again and change happens very slowly.  I decide to do something and then end up not doing it.  I say I’m going to start waking up early but find myself going back to sleep after my alarm goes off.  I decide to read a chapter of a book every day but end up skipping a few days.  I decide to plan every day then get caught up in the moment.  This has happened a lot in my life and continues to happen.

Just look at my last article.   I said I would write a post a week and it’s been 8 days!

Change for me happens very slowly.  But it always happens, eventually.

It’s great to make changes but don’t expect them to happen overnight.

Having reminders are great.  Write to yourself.  Talk to yourself.  Let others know about the changes you are making.  Leave notes for yourself.

Make it a priority or don’t change at all.

 

For additional inspiration:

Zen Habits

 

Much Love,

Andy

 

 

Stuck On Repeat: Is This Groundhog Day?

I find myself falling into the same traps again and again and I wonder if I’ll ever be able to escape.  Will I ever find a way out?  I feel like I’m repeating the same day over and over again.  I make a decision to do something and I end up doing something else.  I say I’m going to stop doing something and I end up doing it.  This happens a lot.

And then I remember that each day comes on its own and that whatever happens, happens.  I do my best and some days changes are made and on other days I end up going backwards but I always keep pushing forward.  I don’t turn back.

I don’t believe I am in control and so I am patient with how things come.  Whether it takes a day or ten years I do not believe I have a choice.  But that doesn’t mean I don’t try.  I always push forward.  But the results are out of my hands.  This is what I believe.

And when I look back I can see all the ways that I have changed slowly, step by step.

So even when I woke up this morning and felt like I was starting back at square one, I kept going because I have faith that one day I’ll make it a little farther along the path and one day I will have freedom.

What about you?  Do you feel trapped?  What are you doing to change?

Much Love,

Andy

Overcoming OCD

I was asked once by somebody how to overcome OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder).  He said he was constantly distracted, lost in thoughts and rituals that he repeated over and over and couldn’t just do the things he wanted/needed to do.  He knew logically that the thoughts he had didn’t make sense and were dragging him down but he couldn’t escape.  It was like being trapped in quicksand.  I’ve never had OCD or had any personal experience with it but I told him this:

Make a decision to stop doing the rituals and always bring your attention back to what you’re doing.  And keep doing this over and over again, every day for the rest of your life.  The road is hard but the fruit is sweet.

Once you’ve made the decision, follow through.

He said it helped.

Much love,

Andy

 

 

Making It Through

Sometimes I get caught up in the day to day trivialities of life.   I find myself at work just repeating old habits and not being aware and present.  And then I come back to the present and quickly lose focus because my mind starts beating itself up for not being present!  It’s a vicious cycle.  When I have a loss of awareness and I feel a flash of anger because of something somebody said I quickly become aware of it and try to regain awareness but it’s hard.  My mind keeps pulling back to what was said and what I should have said, or why he/she shouldn’t have said that.  And then I try to rethink the situation to see it from their perspective and how I might be wrong.  And my mind just keeps running in circles trying to figure out why I felt that way and why I shouldn’t have felt this way and should have said this….  Actually this whole paragraph is a good analogy of how the mind circles around itself.

I don’t know if anybody else experiences this but it happens to me quite regularly.  The only way through it is to always come back to awareness.  I don’t try to stop what my mind is doing but I can be separated from it.  I can remain aware and that is the only freedom I have ever experienced.  And I work on it everyday.  And I fail everyday.  And I repeat.

But I have faith one day I’ll make it through.

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Do you ever experience this?  Do you feel the same?  Do you feel different?

Let me know.

I appreciate you reading this.

Much Love,

Andy

Surrender

Plants bend towards light, not the other way around. Image from Buffalo Niagara Gardening by Dr. Roger P. Hangarter.

 

What Is Surrender?

I believe surrender is complete and total non-resistance.

I guess you could also call it “acceptance”.

How Do I Surrender?

It’s hard to explain.

I step back and become aware of things as they arise.  I become aware of thoughts arising, feelings arising, and urges in my body arising as my body moves.  I reach awareness by focusing on one point that is happening in the present moment, such as my breath.  I remain aware as I am being pushed and pulled to do things by my mind.  And as I remain in this aware state, things happen and actions are taken and decisions are made.

Why Should I Surrender?

I don’t stay in this state forever but I’m trying to move towards it as my natural state.  Through it life for me has become more peaceful, happy, and free.

But really the only reason I do it is because I choose to.

Next Steps

Try it and tell me your thoughts?

Thank you for reading and please leave a comment.  If you’d like my help or want to know more then contact me.

Much Love,

Andy

How To Meditate

The “Steps” To Meditate

1. Sit down (ideally in a quiet place and in a position you feel comfortable)

2. Put your attention on one thing that is happening right now and keep your attention on it

What is happening now may be your breath, a feeling in your body, or a sound.  Just put your attention on something happening now.  I suggest your breath.  You can pay attention to the sound of it, the feel of it against your nostrils or the feeling of your belly rising and falling with the breath.  Choose one aspect and focus on that only.

If you think of anything at all, that’s fine.  Bring your attention back to your breath.  Do this over and over for as long as you’d like to meditate.  Try to sustain your attention on your breath.  Don’t change your breath or do anything else.  Just pay attention to it.

And that’s all.  Really.

Do You Still Need More Information?

I know you have questions and probably want to know more but please just try the practice first, see what happens and then ask about your experiences.

There are hundreds of different ways to meditate.  There are thousands of books and “manuals” of meditation.  I’m sure they all have benefits.  I practice only one.

If you want to meditate then try it.  Please.  And stick with it for at least 20 minutes a day for a month if you want to experience any real effect because in the beginning you may have a lot of resistance towards it and it might be boring.  But keep at it for a month.  Whatever feelings you have towards it are irrelevant, like with physical exercise.  If you want to try it, then do it.  And do it wholeheartedly.

How To Meditate (simple version):

1. Sit down

2. Put your attention on what is happening right now

And then let me know what you think.  How did it go?  Do you have any questions?  Leave a comment or contact me.

My next article on meditation will be on bringing this practice into your daily life.

Much Love,

Andy